Happy Birthday to Mommy!

Today is my mom's birthday.


I've always said she is the person I look up to most in the world. There are many reasons for this. I don't think a few words I type up will be able to convey how awesome she is, but you know I'm going to try. (This is going to be a long one, so get a snack, drink and sit back and enjoy.)


She's not perfect. I call Mom "the dumbest genius I know," because she is just that. My mother can break a computer down piece by piece, put it back together perfectly, and it will run better than ever before. She can figure out how to do any problem you set before her. She's an even bigger nerd than I am (she'll deny it but her being a Harry Potter fan kinda speaks for its self). She knows the answer to nearly everything I have ever asked her. However, common sense eludes this woman. When she got her iPhone, she had it for maybe 2 hours. She called me fuming, "I'm taking this stupid phone back, I can't work this thing." Shocked and confused I told her to calm down and tell me what was wrong. "It won't come on or anything." After talking with her a few minutes, I asked if she had hooked it up to her computer and synced it. "Well no, the AT&T lady said I didn't need to." I told her to sync it and call me back. She called me back like 2 hours later, still pissed. "I don't see why you like this stupid thing, the pictures it takes are horrible. I'm still taking it back." I told her to chill and I would look at it later. Turns out she had the plastic sticker that comes on the phone over the camera. Once I took it off she was impressed with the pictures, and her iPhone is her best friend now. And she's convinced the baseball phrase for doing something well is "batting 100" instead of "batting 1,000" Josh has tried to explain it to her plenty of times, but she doesn't get it. (She has her moments, but even Einstein left the house without pants on because he forgot about them.)


She's actually a gamer. She wore out our Playstation (MediEvil 1 & 2 were her favorites), beat every game I had for my Sega Genesis and Game Gear. She loves The Sims and can kick anyone's ass at Mortal Combat. She has spent endless hours dominating on her Wii. Her prowess is not just limited to video/computer games. She destroys people in board games and her and my dad make up games to play all the time. When she's in a waiting room or just plain bored, she plays on her iPhone like there is no tomorrow. (Told you she's a nerd)


She's stubborn. Don't tell my mom she can't do something. She'll keep at it until she does it. I'm convinced if you told her it is impossible to fly across the country in an hour, she'd go argue with the pilots until they made it happen. She always has to have the last word in any disagreement. I got this trait from her, so you can only guess how much we butt heads.


She's always been there for me. My biological father ran away as soon as he found out she was pregnant. (When I said "my dad" earlier I mean my stepfather. He loves my mom enough to put up with a snot nosed kid who was part of the deal, and has been a better dad than my biological father could ever had been.) This would have broken a lesser woman. She was 20, pregnant and only had her parents, grandparents and siblings in her corner. She worked her ass off for me. Driving to and from work and doctors appointments in a Pinto with no heat in the middle of the winter and a blanket over her ever expanding belly, just so she could give fetal me the best start in life. She has made countless sacrifices for me, and continues to do anything I ask her. Everything from making costumes, helping with class projects that I forgot about until the day before they were due, hauling me all over the Southeast for guard and band stuff, put up with every pageant I wanted to be in, dropping everything at a moment's notice because I needed her and even setting up this blog for me because I am computer stupid. Of course, now I mostly just ask her to watch my little monster men and it's not like I have to twist her arm to do that.


She has beaten Death on more than one occasion. When she was super little, she was hurled through a windshield during a car wreck. My grandma still cries if you ask her to tell the story. She said you just knew Mom wouldn't make it. Mom was riding her bike to the store when she was about 11 and a drunk driver hit her (that's near death experience number two). She almost died from sepsis and insanely high blood pressure going birth to me (there's three). She developed Glomerulonephritis when I was about 14 and needed to have a kidney donated by my aunt (us being half breeds means it's hard to find organ donors outside of family, thank God my aunt was a perfect match. And we're up to four). She almost needed a liver transplant because her medicines almost destroyed it (we'll call that one 4 & 1/2). She was diagnosed with diabetes when she almost slipped into a diabetic coma a few years after that (and that makes five). She's been in good health since all of this. I am convinced God knows I need her around still. He's saved her so many times. Other than my children, Momma is the greatest gift from God I have ever received.


She's as devoted to my children as she is to me. I'm her only child, my little men are her only grandchildren. There isn't a thing she won't do for these rugrats. And they know exactly how to push her buttons. I honestly don't think she's ever told them no. They love her just as much as she loves them (and maybe more than they love me). Just a little bit ago, my big boy came up to me and said, "Mommy, today is Grammy's birthday. Can she come and play with us?" I couldn't help but smile.


Lots of girls dread becoming their mother. I've always thought I would be hugely successful if I developed even just a quarter of the strength this woman has. She is a freakin rock and seems almost too strong to be human. She is fierce and the toughest person I know. There is no way I can ever express how much she means to me, this post was as close as I could get. If any of you want to know more about this real life Super Woman, check out her blog where she explains why It's A Wonderful Life.

I love you, Mom! Happy Birthday!


- Whether you love me or hate me, you know who I am.